Free Will

I was remembering how two moral concepts, loyalty and service to my country and dedication to God and the Catholic Church, were so strongly inculcated during my early years at St. Anne School. It caused me to realize why the constitutional precept of separation of church and state, a dubious interpretation of the First Amendment, evokes such an allergic reaction in me. My country in a sense is "my mother" as much as God is my "Father" (capitalization asserted out of respect for Him.) In my conscience they are inseparable. But, is my dedication to God and Country a result of early brainwashing, the American Catholic equivalent of the "Hilter Youth effect" ? Or, have I indeed developed an informed conscience and sense of right, wrong, morality, loyalty, faith, etc., with which to freely regulate my behavior?

I believe "Free Will" is a gift from God. I "choose" to believe. It is the fact that I am making a choice that proves I am exercising my free will. This very essay in which I examine and question my choice is further evidence. If I am cognizant enough to ask the question then am I not intellectually free to choose my path? ("Cognito, ergo, sum." I think, therefore, I am.") But, this entire dilemma of philosophical issues needs examination.

Are we not indoctrinated with the "morally correct" answers during our formation in school, i.e., provided with an informed conscience by an infallible moral authority? Would you deny Christ as Peter did? Would you denounce God to be spared the sword? Would you betray your country to save your life? Are you Benedict Arnold or Nathan Hale? Catholic school certainly had it's scary days!

Yet, in spite of the brainwashing, (oops! er ... ummm... I mean "formation") do we not have a free will? Can we not find our courage in our own conscience? Can we choose the righteous path, not because it is the expected and proclaimed "morally correct" response, but because we know it is the way of truth?